“We never reach a goal hoped for. But we can reach a goal unhoped for. At times this can hold good surprises for me.” Hélène Cixous, Writing Blind I am trying to make something good here. I am doing it at the expense of the thing. Sometimes I forget. I wonder what could have been… Continue reading Hot room
Category: Writing
Resort
“Every story tells of a ghost. At the end, the centre of a story is a Black Hole, but it isn’t black, and it isn’t dark. In the best case, it might gleam.” Judith Hermann, We Would Have Told Each Other Everything What I will say is this: spring always comes. That is not what… Continue reading Resort
March
Chose peace in the end and trying to congratulate myself for that, queasy with the thought that if my hand hadn’t been forced I’m not sure I would have done it. Knowing that what matters isn’t how we made the choice but the choice we made in the end, it doesn’t really matter how we… Continue reading March
Backwash
Last night I dreamed about a lady with a VHS tape for a mouth and when the tape started spooling out she couldn’t speak any more she just stood there, mouth lolling open and eyes wide. We kept taking her apart and trying to put her back together. It’s not exactly what I’d envisioned for… Continue reading Backwash
Leftovers
"These little stones, thoughtfully placed, only one each time, on the edge of a name as the promise of a return." - Jacques Derrida, The Deaths of Roland Barthes Thoughts are bugs flying into a windscreen. I start thinking 'if she was here' and the thoughts go splat. I think of the bonfire night when… Continue reading Leftovers
With love on a birthday
"It is said that mourning, by its gradual labour, slowly erases pain; I could not, I cannot believe this; because for me, Time eliminates the emotion of loss (I do not weep), that is all. For the rest, everything has remained motionless. For what I have lost is not a Figure (the Mother), but a… Continue reading With love on a birthday
I am 29 and the world is at my feet
I have to start writing again, not because I've been wasting time finding other things to do but more because I've found new sanctity in time. I used to scoff at people who lamented the brevity of things as though they were greedy for wanting more than their share. Now I am hungry for everything… Continue reading I am 29 and the world is at my feet
July
It is this deep blankness is the real thing strange. The more things happen to you the more you can’t Tell or remember even what they were. The contradictions cover such a range. The talk would talk and go so far aslant. You don’t want madhouse and the whole thing there. - Let it Go,… Continue reading July
new haven
"Sometimes a vast solitude opened in my head and the entire world disappeared inside it, but came out again intact, without a scratch, with nothing missing." —Maurice Blanchot, The Madness of the Day Haven’t had anything to do with the man on my mind since he saw my initials on a list and emailed me… Continue reading new haven
Letters for Rent 